Live-in Relationships and Civil Marriage in the Bible

2/09/2019 , 0 Comments

Choosing Civil or Church Wedding

In the society where we live in today, it is a common thing that we come across single parents – either they had failed marriages so they separated, or they just happened to beget children out of wedlock.

Whichever is the case, these single moms or single dads usually look for another partner, and then they live together even without entering into marriage at all. Given this situation, the question that might arise is, is it wrong for a man and a woman to live together outside marriage, specifically a marriage that is officiated by a priest or a pastor?

Actually, a civil wedding is much better than a religious wedding. In wedding ceremonies officiated by priests or pastors you would be required to give offerings and you have to pay a certain amount. They make money out of it. But biblically speaking, it is not really the marriage certificate that matters most but the sincerity of both parties to live together as husband and wife.

GALATIANS 3:15 says,

Brethren, I speak after the manner of men; Though it be but a man’s covenant, yet if it be confirmed, no man disannulleth, or addeth thereto.

It is very clear that, if both parties come up with a mutual agreement to live together as husband and wife, it is already acknowledged by God – even if they were not married by a priest. You see, there is nowhere in the Bible will you find that Joseph and Mary got married, or that there was a wedding ceremony that took place at all.

MATTHEW 1:18-20 says,

18 Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as his mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost.
19 Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a public example, was minded to put her away privily.
20 But while he thought on these things, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared unto him in a dream, saying, Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost.

It means that they were betrothed or engaged to be married. But before the actual wedding ceremony took place Mary was found with a child because God made her an instrument for the birth of Christ. At first, Joseph decided to put Mary away because he thought that she became unfaithful to him. Until the angel told him, “fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife . . .”

But what was clear was that Mary was already acknowledged as Joseph’s wife even if they were just engaged then. And even if there was no formal wedding ceremony yet, God regarded Joseph and Mary as a couple already.

This is just to prove that the pact between a man and a woman is more important than a marriage certificate. Even if you have all the documents signed before a priest, they would all be useless if the contracting parties would not be true to their wedding vows and would just keep on fighting day and night. That is why it would be best to assess everything first before entering into an agreement to live with someone. Foremost, you have to be sure that the person you decide to live with truly loves you despite your past. But if you start to feel that he is taking you for granted, better watch out because that is a manifestation that he doesn’t really love you. Better find a man who would love you very much and who would care for you even if you have a child out of wedlock. If he truly loves you, he would also accept and love your child, and he would provide all your needs, both material and emotional.

I TIMOTHY 5:8 says,

But if any provide not for his own, and especially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

For God, anyone who does not care for his own, especially for his family is considered wicked. Irresponsible fathers and irresponsible mothers are regarded by the Bible as wicked. So, if you see that your partner right now does not care for his household, you are in trouble. There is a big possibility that you might spend the rest of your life in misery if you would stick to that man.

Think very well before deciding to spend your life with someone until death.


Love and Relationships: How Should Millennials Handle Falling in Love, the Biblical Way?

2/02/2019 39 Comments

Biblical Advice on Young Romance

In what they call digital age, the so-called millennials, or today’s Generation Z, have differing attitudes towards love and relationships. But it’s not only the younger generation that displays a liberal stand on this matter but also those who were born way, way ahead. Many take relationships as a mere game, something that is done for fun only, something that shouldn’t be taken seriously. And being such, they do not settle with just one partner; sometimes they have romantic relationships with more than one person. And fidelity seems to be out of the question.

Is that how God wants us to regard relationships, specifically, the relationship between a man and a woman?

The will of God is for us to be faithful to our partners, or sweethearts. And to show God that you are faithful to your partner, even if you are not married yet, you should no longer flirt with others. You should not even send text messages to another because that is usually how infidelity begins. If you are already engaged in a relationship you should not go out with anybody anymore. Let us not practice what the ungodly people do for they just take relationships for fun.

JAMES 5:12 says,

But above all things, my brethren, swear not, neither by any other oath: but let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation.

That is the law of the Gospel. And this law is not just for a group but also for those who are in a relationship. That is why if a woman has committed herself to be in a relationship with a man, she should no longer entertain other men. The same applies with the man. The moment that he commits himself to a woman in a relationship, he should refrain from displaying himself to other women and he should stop hanging out with friends the way he used to.

What is the implication if a man, who is already in a relationship, is found to be in relationship also with another woman simultaneously?

JAMES 1:7-8 says,

7 For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord.
8 A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.

When can a man be considered double minded? When he claims that he loves more than one woman. He must be crazy! You can never love two at the same time. Christ said that the two shall be one flesh. Never did He say that the three, or four, or five shall be one flesh. That cannot be! The three, or four, or five can never be one flesh and spirit. There will surely be envy and jealousy and strife. 

When it comes to romantic relationships, God does not permit a third party. It should be between one man and one woman only. A man should not take two women at the same time. During the time of the Israelites, anyone who commits that is burnt.

LEVITICUS 20:14 says,

And if a man take a wife and her mother, it is wickedness: they shall be burnt with fire, both he and they; that there be no wickedness among you.

That is an example of an unforgivable sin. A man who takes the mother of his wife and makes her his concubine is committing an unforgivable sin. And during the time of the Israelites, all the three of them shall be burnt to death.

Now, what does it teach us? As written in II TIMOTHY 3:16,

All Scriptures is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness.

You cannot have two sweethearts, or two spouses, at the same time. If you do that, it would mean that you are a “double minded man”. And as mentioned in JAMES 1:7, “... for let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord.”

Apparently, that is something very serious. If you are a double minded man you would not receive anything from God – both spiritual and material.

JAMES 1:8 also said that “A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.” So, ladies, beware! Do not ever fall in love with a double minded man even if he happens to be the handsomest of all. Supposing that you already have a feeling for that man, suppress that feeling. If you insist in having a relationship with that kind of man, it’s just like committing suicide. As the word of God said, that man shall not receive anything from Him. In the sight of God, that man is wicked.

In other words, before you enter into a relationship, think about it very well. Be sure that you are his only one, and will always be the only one. Do not make hasty decisions which, later on, you will regret.